I am Avdar Shailovski, a major who deserted the Israeli military. I declare, while of sound mind, that I left the Israeli military because I could no longer bear to remain a silent witness—betraying my own humanity—to all the crimes I witnessed during my five years of service.
The events I witnessed will suffocate me if I do not share them with you.
I could die at any moment from the sheer weight of my grief; therefore, I must contribute to revealing the truth—perhaps it will alleviate my sense of guilt, and perhaps God will lessen the torment that awaits me for the horrific acts I committed simply by virtue of being a member of the Israel Defense Forces.
Then, I received a sign: "Leave everything behind and go your own way."
Thank You, God, for guiding me.
What I witnessed during my five-year service in the Israel Defense Forces (IDF) is difficult to put into words.
What words could possibly describe the cruelty, the vileness, and the atrocities committed by the IDF against the Palestinians?
Do not believe a word from that wretched man—that scoundrel, son of a scoundrel. He is a despicable liar, especially when he claims the Israeli army is "the most moral army in the world"—what utter nonsense! The truth is, it is the most depraved, cruel, and brutal army in the world.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I can no longer bear to witness the ruin and destruction in Gaza.
I was a witness to what took place on the night of October 7, 2023. Israeli intelligence, that wretched man, and his gang knew it was coming; they waited for it to happen so they could justify the destruction of Gaza and attempt to displace its population.
I served in Gaza, and I saw with my own eyes how a tank commander would toy with his tank’s cannon, firing shells at Palestinians huddled inside their tents, or at groups of people standing in lines—whether in front of bakeries, or by vehicles distributing food and aid. With my own eyes, I witnessed aircraft firing projectiles at inhabited residential buildings, reducing them to rubble atop the people living inside.
With my own eyes, I saw snipers from the occupation army amusing themselves by picking off children, adults, and women as they stood in line to receive aid.
This is madness.
Crimes such as these—which I witnessed—could not happen anywhere else in the world; they occur only on the land of Palestine.
With my own eyes, I saw a child clutching a piece of stale, blood-soaked bread, weeping over his mother’s body—while the soldiers laughed, as if they were watching a comedy video.
They claim that these people are not human beings, not equals to us—to us Jews.
I would summon my courage and say to my colleagues, "Brother, even if they were a group of monkeys, could we possibly kill them in this manner?"
They would reply, "You are a coward; you are weak—you are not fit to be a Jew."
I saw settlers in the West Bank uprooting olive trees and assaulting farmers in their own fields.
I saw them destroy homes—issuing an immediate evacuation order to the owners, only to demolish the structures while the residents were still inside.
With my own eyes, I saw a soldier send a text message to a Palestinian, telling him: "Go up to the roof, or we will destroy the house—with your family inside—because of you." When the man climbed to the roof and began waving a white rag, the soldier shot him dead on the spot.
Can anyone believe this? I can find no explanation for all this Israeli cruelty other than the upbringing we Jews were subjected to. We were told that Arabs are filthy, savage, and extremist Muslim killers—and that if we were kind to them, they would throw us into the sea. Just imagine the kind of indoctrination they fed us.
They taught us that the land of Palestine belongs to us, the Jews.
They claimed that the Golan and the entire Levant belong to the children of Zion.
They taught us that "Greater Israel" stretches from the Euphrates to the Nile.
How wicked we Jews must be to believe all these lies. If we were not wicked, foolish, and devoid of morality, we would never have carried out these orders.
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